What you need to properly speak advice. Literate speech: how to make your speech beautiful

Roman Shirokiy

Reading time: 8 minutes

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Not everyone can competently express thoughts in words and on paper. Therefore, we will consider the topic of how to learn to speak competently with people in English and Russian.

If you want to be successful in life, learn, improve, and strive to be better. An educated person is a useful person, before whom paths and roads open up.

Step-by-step action plan

As practice shows, people have to write infrequently, since computer technology has flooded all spheres of activity. But sometimes you can't do without literate writing skills. You have to talk every day.

  • Be patient and morale. Only a literate person is capable of managing life, becoming an independent and leading person.
  • Read more ... Reading will help develop visual memory. I advise you to read the classics, since modern editions, due to the constant haste and rhythm of life, are not devoid of mistakes.
  • Choose books based on personal interests ... Some people like science fiction, others prefer adventure. It doesn't matter which genre you choose. The main thing is that reading is enjoyable.
  • Read aloud to train your auditory memory ... Make a short pause after each comma in the text. As a result, during a conversation, speech will begin to sound correct and balanced.
  • Rewrite the pages of books ... People know the rules well, but they make mistakes while writing the text. It doesn't hurt to rewrite a few pages from your favorite book every day. Improve literacy through this technique.
  • Learn texts by heart ... Poems or short excerpts from a story will work. Memorization stimulates memory. Perhaps the lesson will initially be intimidating, but after a little practice, you can easily cope with the task and increase your IQ.
  • Exercise regularly ... We are talking about writing vocabulary and text dictations, speaking in front of a mirror. Remember that literacy is not a gift from God, but the result of training.
  • Involve an outsider in your workouts ... Together with him, conduct a dialogue, discuss various topics, correct each other.
  • Buy a spelling dictionary ... The guide will help you make sure the spelling of words. The dictionary will help out in case of unexpected difficulties.
  • Build a Dictionary of Difficult Words ... We are talking about words and phrases that are difficult to spell and pronounce. Using a dictionary, gradually "tame" difficult words.
  • Keep a diary ... Record results and achievements, highlight points that deserve attention. This will allow you to effectively work on errors.

Each person has their own abilities. Some have developed auditory memory, others have excellent visual memory. Listen to the advice that works best for you. This is the secret of success.

How to speak competently with people

Competent speech often becomes a recommendation in various situations. We are talking about passing exams, employment, private conversations and public speaking. Poor vocabulary and inability to correctly present information often fails. Continuing the topic of the article, I will tell you about the intricacies of mastering a competent conversation with people.

How to speak Russian competently

Competent speech is a component of the image. It accounts for 25 percent of the impression of a person. The interlocutors pay attention to the beauty and correctness of speech, and only after that to diction and voice.

Literate speech is a help in life. She promotes career growth, increasing popularity and respect, helps to find a girl or boyfriend.

If you strive to get a leadership position, knowledge will help, because a real boss should be able to ignite the team. They will also come in handy for an ordinary person who wants to make life comfortable and multifaceted.

Video secrets of literate speech

Learning to speak English correctly

If you want to find a job in Europe or like to relax abroad, check out the material on a competent conversation in English. It is believed that breaking the language barrier is not easy, and it is. But if you apply the means to an end, everything will work out.

During a conversation, people understand the interlocutor, but cannot answer. The reason for this is not a modest vocabulary or lack of knowledge, but a lack of speaking practice and a psychological barrier.

The main horror story is the language barrier. There are many reasons why it appears, it makes no sense to consider them. I will direct your energies to remove the obstacle. Here are some tips that will help you improve your conversational English.

  1. Learn the words first. ... This will open up access to new conversational topics.
  2. Learn antonyms and synonyms ... Thanks to this, speech will become beautiful and rich. When learning a new word, look in the dictionary for the presence of antonyms and synonyms.
  3. Use phrases, speech constructions and phrasal verbs ... These constructs will help you start a conversation beautifully and competently.
  4. Expand your active vocabulary ... These are the words that are used in speech. The number of ways of self-expression depends on the size of the stock.
  5. Improve your pronunciation ... Indistinct pronunciation of English sounds often becomes the reason why the interlocutor does not understand the speaker. For this purpose, imitate the speech of correctly speaking people. Use the speech of an English-speaking friend, favorite actor, teacher, or speaker as a guide.
  6. Pay special attention to audio recordings ... They will help you master colloquial phrases. Load several such audio recordings into the player and listen. If possible, repeat after the announcer. This will increase the effectiveness of the session.
  7. Work with videos ... Watch videos of your interest and listen to native speakers speak. This will help you learn a lot of spoken phrases and master the technique of articulation.
  8. Sing in English ... I think you listen to music in English all the time. I recommend not only listening, but also singing, keeping up with the singer's tempo and uttering every word.
  9. Read aloud ... If you can't listen to audio recordings or watch videos, read aloud. This method is inferior to the previous two in terms of efficiency, but you should not discount it, especially if you are improving the language on your own at home.
  10. Talk more often ... Constant communication in English will bring the moment of reaching the goal closer. Finding an English-speaking interlocutor is not difficult if you connect the Internet and voice technology.
  11. Record your voice ... Select a general conversation topic, turn on the recorder and record your voice. Then listen carefully to the recording, paying attention to the moments characterized by the appearance of hitches and long pauses. As a result, you will see what to work on.
  12. Practice ... Do not forget, only constant practice of speech will bear fruit and one cannot do with theory. There are many useful tutorials to read, but you can't learn English without practice. I advise you to work with a partner. This can be a brother, neighbor, or beloved wife.

I hope you read the tips carefully and apply them in real life. If this does not work out, seek help from a mentor or sign up for a language course.

In conclusion, I will add that literacy is a factor that determines a person's ability to speak their native language, the ability to speak coherently and logically, and the skills to correctly use words in conversation and writing.

What is literacy for?

Today, when the rules of the language are being simplified, and people are slowly forgetting what reading and writing with a pen is, literacy remains an indicator of culture. It acts as the basis on which personality development is built. Many books and textbooks provide access to the treasury of knowledge created by previous generations.

As history shows, literacy has been used by parties and ruling circles to promote ideas and achieve goals. Literacy began to spread simultaneously with the spread of Christianity. In those days, only people who could read participated in church rituals.

At the beginning of the last century, the authorities took steps to educate the population. At that moment, the country needed educated people and specialists. The revolution marked the beginning of a process of simplification of the language, the intensity of which has reached its peak today. It is all the fault of the development of communications, which leads to the withering away of traditional analogs. At first glance, it seems that this process is harmless. However, simplification of spelling and grammar rules will sooner or later lead to simplified thinking.

In the 21st century, illiteracy is universal in nature. Even not all politicians and high-ranking officials are fluent in speech. What to say about the common people. And this is against the background of the fact that the unity of the nation is based on a single language on which national self-determination is built.

No matter how rich a person is, money will not make him cultured. Literacy is the only criterion that determines the level of culture and education. However, even these concepts are not promoted.

If you are a true Russian, your task is to preserve your native language. Now you know how to learn to speak and write correctly in Russian. See you!

Compare with this option:

The other day I could not speak because nothing came to my mind.

Last week, when I was talking to a potential client, I couldn't say a word because my head was empty.

Which example do you think is more successful and more likely to attract people's attention? Of course, the last one.

If in 1987 US President Ronald Reagan in his speech R. Reagan's speech in front of the Brandenburg Gate in Berlin about the Berlin Wall said something like:

This wall is something mmm ... that shouldn't be there, so let's get it out of the way as soon as possible.

Such a message would simply get lost in the information flow. Instead, a laconic and succinct challenge was thrown:

Take down this wall!

Surely you noticed (if not for yourself, then for someone from others) speech defects of a rhythmic nature. When words are pronounced abruptly, with too long pauses, or vice versa, the person chatters so that the listener does not have time to understand his thoughts.

To feel the difference in perception, try saying the phrase below. Pronounce each syllable clearly and take short pauses between words. Hear the sound of your speech:

I'm going to the gym today. Perhaps with a friend.

You will end up with a so-called "graded" speech, in which too much emphasis is placed on individual syllables, and this is a mistake.

Now try mixing each word with the next to make it seem like one whole passage. Read without hesitation, but also slowly:

Today I go-to-the-gym-a-possibility-friend.

It may seem that this option sounds a little sloppy. In fact, speech with such smooth transitions becomes easier to understand by ear.

As for a too fast pace, there is a risk not only to remain misunderstood, but also to blurt out something unnecessary (for example, in a fit of emotion). Recording on a dictaphone will help to track the speed of speech.

Try to inhale deeply before each sentence and think that they are listening to you with great interest and you have nowhere to rush.

3. Inability to use body language

Many people know the difference between closed and open options, but they continue to use closed gestures when, on the contrary, they should open up.

Movements and facial expressions are characterized as open if they express a friendly attitude and readiness for interaction: when the palms are not hiding, the gaze is directed into the eyes of the interlocutor, the feet are turned in his direction, and the like. Closed gestures include crossing arms or legs, looking to the side or at the phone, clenched fists - anything that indicates tension or even aggression.

We all have natural tendencies to behave in one way or another depending on the situation. If you disagree with someone, the body automatically reacts: you constrict your pupils, turn your head away, cross your arms. Conversely, when you are understood, listened to, and supported, you unconsciously open up.

However, it is not always worth giving non-verbal signals to the interlocutor; often the situation requires the opposite. Try to control your body movements and facial expressions while talking. Pay attention to the position of the hands, which facial muscles are tense. With practice, you can manage this.

4. The habit of arguing

Expressing disagreement in and of itself is not a bad thing. As they say, truth is born in a dispute. This gives rise to creative ideas, an incentive to learn and improve something. All of these can be useful and necessary for social interaction, even if you oppose many people.

Disagreement can be considered a mistake only when nothing depends on the consent or disagreement of the interlocutors and does not change. That is, if it is an empty argument that does not bring any results other than irritating opponents. Discussions like this are not about learning new things. When you say someone is wrong, you are in a verbal status battle with them. And that is why most of the disputants remain unconvinced - in order to preserve their dignity.

The next time you hear an absurd or incorrect, in your opinion, point of view, first find out why the person thinks so, and do not rush to refute him.

If, even after listening to the arguments, you disagree with someone else's opinion, do not engage in useless. Instead, turn the conversation to a different topic where you can come to an understanding. Is there no such area? Then just avoid communicating with this person.

5. Lack of topics for conversation

In an unfamiliar company or in a conversation with people new to you, words can dry out very quickly due to the difficulties in choosing a common topic. Probably, each of us at least once in our life had to draw out some phrases from ourselves, trying to fill in awkward pauses. In order not to get into uncomfortable situations, you can come up with a list of on-duty topics in advance and use them on occasion.

Imagine the circumstances when you want to start a conversation with a stranger or unfamiliar interlocutor: near the cooler at work, when meeting in a cafe, at a bus stop.

Prepare 10 topics that are appropriate for conversation with anyone in any situation.

This is easier than it sounds. For example, you can always ask about life or work (of course, unobtrusively and delicately), discuss the latest news (but it is advisable to avoid politics), ask for advice on any issue. A win-win, albeit not very interesting, option is talking about the weather.

6. Illiterate speech

Do not forget that a conversation with a literate, educated person is perceived better than with someone who is confused in cases and vocabulary. Improve the culture of your speech, read more, use dictionaries. But at the same time, it is important to remember about a sense of proportion: do not turn into a boring clever man and do not burden the interlocutor with phrases and terms that are too complicated for him.

These are the most common mistakes in speaking. Do you have any of them? Maybe you know a good way to get rid of them? Share your experience in the comments.

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04/02/2015: How to learn to speak Russian correctly?

If you do not pay attention to this in a timely manner, such a pronunciation can be fixed in the student's speech for a long time. He shoveled through a lot of messages that came through the tapes of agencies, called several ballet specialists, even talked to the head of the troupe! Of course, the Russian language is very mobile, foreign words, one way or another, penetrate it, some take root, others do not, however, respect for the native language should be maintained. And this despite the fact that he has long been an adult and a father.

How to speak Russian correctly in Russia is a question that interests not only foreigners, but also the Russian population of our country. This, in particular, is confirmed by the explanatory dictionaries of the Russian language. It is surprising that your pet will try to sing along almost immediately, and soon will remember those phrases that are repeated all the time. After all, men also love when they are attentively happened, they also demand respect for themselves, and for some of them it is also very important to be listened to.

As for timbre, you should try to speak in a low voice. And of course, in no case should you be annoyed with the client if he does not understand what you are talking about. In a work collective, you will become popular, competent speech will help you win the attention of your superiors and staff, and move up the career ladder.

A person who knows how to speak correctly, understandably, convincingly, and beautifully will always achieve what he needs. But, since we are talking about working moments, we will dwell on them.

Sorry has a rival, a strange word - sorry. They are pleased to always hear about how someone can depend on them, in a good sense. If you send them instructions and requests in writing, the likelihood of their execution will increase significantly. Any special terminology is understandable for you, but not for him. This is inevitable, because knowledge of a literary language is a necessary component of education, intelligence, an essential element of the status of a modern person. While they are in the store, whose employees know where they can order heating of a country house at a bargain price, they must examine the product and be convinced of the advantages of your store, remember it as “good”.

If your financial difficulties are of a temporary nature, a phone call to the bank with a promise to pay off the debt in the near future will be enough. But it may also happen that the girl's parents ask for time to discuss the marriage proposal. These will be your initial tasks for learning conversational speech. You will understand a lot about yourself by hearing your speech and seeing yourself in a communication situation. However, try to make the conversation professional, without violating both your rights and the rights of a traffic police inspector.

When expressing your point of view, use as few words as possible. For example: instead of "Oh, we're late!" So in what way should we men communicate with representatives of the opposite sex, so that we are pleasant to them in such an interesting lesson? But in everything there should be a measure. Just listen to what the client asks about and tell them about it. This is the whole people. This is his culture, his language. Well, if this is his usual manner of speaking, then a lot of work will have to be done here.

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The image of each person is twenty-five percent dependent on his speech. It doesn't matter what your social status is, if you want to gain the attention and disposition of others, then you have to work on it. In order for the interlocutor to show his interest in you, you must have good diction and grammatically correct speech, you should also pay attention to the formulation of the voice.

The ability to conduct a conversation will help in the most unpredictable situations in life. Your opinion will be taken into account not only by close people, but also by work colleagues, your career will go up sharply, you will become an excellent interlocutor with whom it is interesting to talk, and you can easily speak in front of a huge audience.

This skill is also useful for managers, because, for example, it is easier to find partners for deals than to keep their attention and interest with your proposal. And this will help correct business conversation.

Learning to speak correctly is easy, for this you just need to arm yourself with patience and attention.

Learning to speak competently

1. The first thing you have to do is to acquire a pleasant habit - to read, at least 15-20 minutes a day.

Thanks to reading, you will replenish your vocabulary, learn to express your thoughts correctly and build sentences.

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3. Do not use words in a conversation whose meaning is unfamiliar to you. Explanatory dictionaries and reference books to help, thanks to them you will expand your vocabulary, at the same time, and pay attention to the stress in some words.

4. Try to increase the time of the conversation with your interlocutor. But, if there is no way to talk to someone, I advise you to find a video where the announcer clearly and impeccably articulates each phrase, and repeat after him. Such an exercise helps to expand the vocabulary and forms the correct, with intonational pauses, speech.

5. Find an interlocutor with whom you could discuss movies, TV programs or books at your leisure.

6. Record your speech from time to time, so you will be sure that you are on the right course towards excellence. Remember to pay attention to the coherence of speech and the length of the pauses. Deliberately prolonged pauses betray a kind of theatricality of speech, which immediately repels the interlocutor.

7. Learn to correctly present and present information beautifully. A simple exercise will help you with this - "let's talk about nothing." Try to describe an object, such as a vase, in literary language for 4-5 minutes, then move on to the next subject. Increase the exercise time every day, and you will not notice how in the near future, in conversation, you can easily switch to any topic.

8. Forget obscene words, do not use terms incomprehensible to your interlocutor. Don't use formulaic phrases.

9. Learn how to write sentences correctly, two exercises will help you with this:
1) choose a definition for any word, for example: "joy is ...";
2) write a few words on paper and make sentences out of them.

10. Looking in the mirror, tell yourself about the events that happened to you during the day, while controlling your gestures and facial expressions.

And remember the most reliable indicator of the level of your achievement will be the listener's reaction to your speech.

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In an effort to master fashionable and prestigious languages ​​- English, German, Chinese - modern young people pay less and less attention to native speech. Someone does not consider this necessary, someone relies on text editors, and there are those who are sure that the school course is quite enough for the current activity.

Nevertheless, employers pay attention to the literacy of the documents drawn up, so for many people it is important to independently study the Russian language. But is it possible to achieve the desired result without a tutor?

Here are some tips from educators:

Start with grammar. Few people have the innate ability to "feel" language. To freely maneuver among the overwhelming majority of the rules, it is enough to master the textbooks in grades 5-10. It’s even easier if you had good grades in school. Russian language. In this case, diagrams and humorous pictures-rules, which are enough on the Internet, will help to "get back in shape".

Try to use text editors as little as possible. Firstly, they are often wrong, and secondly, they reduce your self-confidence.

Don't relax.

How to learn to speak beautifully

Self-study of the Russian language presupposes constant work on oneself, therefore, even while communicating in chats with friends, you need to monitor the spelling and punctuation.

Work on your pronunciation. Wrong accents in words like "cakes" and "calling" during communication will give away your educational gaps.

Read the classics. So you remember at the visual level how certain words are spelled. At the same time, you have a huge choice. An excellent alternative to Dostoevsky's "boring reading" will be the works of foreign authors translated into Russian. True, before reading it, you should ask for reviews on the quality of the translation.

And one more piece of advice. To improve pronunciation, follow the announcers of news broadcasts or culture channels. This is where you have the most chances to "absorb" the thoroughbred sound classical Russian language. And if you want to study with us, you are welcome! The site has a lot of interesting material for learning the Russian language!

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Beautiful and competent speech is the dream of many people of different sexes and ages. Some people are endowed with the art of speaking correctly from birth, while others learn it all their lives. After all, a competently speaking person will be able to convince the interlocutor of his point of view, and his speech sounds much more confident. These abilities are important not only for public people, but also for the common person. We will tell you how to develop speech and learn to speak beautifully.

The main steps to success

Speaking to colleagues

  • awareness of the problem in speech and a great desire to change it;
  • having patience, which is very useful with repetitions of exercises and workouts;
  • some amount of time and place to study;
  • unlimited confidence in success;
  • assistance of family and friends.

Training program

The program of action itself is very simple, interesting and effective. Having written the points of the plan on a sheet, you can safely begin to implement them.

Reading classical works is considered the foundation of literate speech. It is they who are saturated with original speech patterns that help to understand the heroes of that time, their thoughts, experiences, spiritual values. Well-written dialogues give the reader a feel for the essence of the relationship of a certain period. Some phrases with the help of which people, household items of that time are described, help to plunge into the atmosphere of the inner world of the heroes, into the development of their ideas.

Speech rate and listeners attention

The pace of your speech and its influence on others can be easily felt when you record your speech on a dictaphone. When listening to yourself, it will become clear what prevents the audience from focusing on your speech and listening to it with interest to the end.

Most often, listeners are strained by excessive monotony or, conversely, an increased speed of presentation of the material. Without assimilating the content of the conversation, people instantly lose interest in it. And even the most unusual material, delivered in a monotonous speech, will not arouse the approval of the audience.

The problem of choosing a speech tempo is not the most difficult task. The main thing is to feel the audience and change the intonation in time in order to periodically shake the audience.

You can learn more about speech techniques in the video:

Using jewelry in speech

Any text, dryly stated, is difficult for the interlocutor to perceive. But add a little humor or some precise sayings and the audience is already full of attention. The secret here is simple - to use humor correctly, quotes from famous people can only be a well-read person, as close as possible to his listeners. The speaker becomes an authority for them, a respected person who can be trusted in judgment. And this is already a big part of the success with the public.

The surest way to add embellishments to speech is to develop your own style. To do this, you need to read a lot and thoughtfully.

Public speaking to different audiences

Toast at a wedding is a great practice!

It is impossible to develop speech and learn to speak beautifully without practical presentations. Unfamiliar listeners of different sex and age are especially valuable. There is no need to be afraid to publicly express your point of view, to voice your thoughts, even if the first experience is not as successful as expected.

You do not need to stop there, but, on the contrary, continue to speak in front of people in public. With each new performance, self-confidence will be added, and this is another stage on the path to success.

Record your favorite phrases, quotes and thoughts

Writing down in a notebook or notebook what you liked in the book or heard in a conversation, you can use this in your speech in the future. It helps a lot to analyze your performances or the performances of other people. In this case, it is better not to fix mistakes, but to write down the best moments of the discussions.

What is the difference between pleasant and repulsive conversationalists? Is it all about an innate propensity for communication? In fact, in 90% of cases, it is not talent that saves, but resourcefulness, self-discipline and continuous work on oneself. It's no secret: every detail is important - posture, facial expressions, gestures, tone. And if these components can be quickly mastered with the help of physical effort, more will be required for competent speech. How to speak correctly and be a great storyteller?

Use verified data

Gossiping damages the reputation of a decent person. Any unverified or dubious information is considered gossip. To avoid embarrassing moments and not make yourself look bad, it is better to use only reliable facts in the story.

However, there are situations in which every detail is important, even an unlikely one. Then, in order not to mislead the opponent, sentences begin with phrases:

  • “I'm not sure if this is true, but ...”;
  • “I heard such information from neighbors / acquaintances / passers-by, but I don’t know how much it corresponds to reality ...”;
  • “I don’t have a definite answer to this question, but there are several hypothetical versions ...”;
  • “I think so, but it is quite possible that I am wrong. Double-check the information in reference books or with specialists ”.

In other words, these statements have only a conjectural, hypothetical connotation. The interlocutor clearly understands: the information may not correspond to the truth. However, the details will help you find the answer, give you direction.

Arm yourself with arguments

This concerns controversial points. Even if the question has an irrefutable answer, the interlocutor may not know about it. In such situations, you cannot insult your opponent, laugh at him, accuse him of ignorance. Trying to insist on an answer without proper argumentation will also be useless. Therefore, the best solution would be a detailed explanation with the announcement or demonstration of evidence. They can be:

  • scientific research results;
  • real life examples;
  • material evidence - video or audio recordings, photographs, samples;
  • authoritative literary sources - reference books, encyclopedias, textbooks;
  • statistics, experiments, logical reasoning.

Maintain purity of speech

Fashion has even touched colloquial speech. Therefore, words of foreign origin have become the norm. Sometimes they really come to the rescue, as they save time, help to briefly describe phenomena, objects that are difficult to translate into their native language in one phrase. However, sometimes these “linguistic foreigners” sound ridiculous.

"We'll use the beauty center to demonstrate the fashion collection."

"The team building will take place at open air place."

"There is no connection with the cleaning worker."

How to explain to a person accustomed to normal speech what these sentences say about a fashion show, a corporate party and a cleaning lady? In order to avoid semantic errors and misunderstandings, it is better to use Russian counterparts whenever possible.

A few more problems of the modern "fashionable" language- slang, jargon, deliberate reduction of words. The phrase "grandmothers are spinning the rules like this", uttered by the CFO, will not add respect or trust to him. And the words “hey, cool chick, don’t ho’ ride a car? ” is unlikely to help you develop a healthy romantic relationship. Funny? Nevertheless, these are realities; to confirm them, it is enough to listen to the conversations of others. The result will be rather disastrous.

A huge ulcer on the body of speech is obscene language... It is most commonly used for three reasons:

  • an attempt to attract attention, seem older, “join” the company (for teenagers);
  • creating a comic or emotionally intense effect;
  • expression of negative emotions.

And now is the time for a paradox: scientists have found that swearing is good for the body, as it helps to endure pain more easily. It turns out that a “sharp word” sometimes helps out? Perhaps, but not during a business meeting, communicating with an unfamiliar person, or as an insult. Therefore, one should not forget about the limits of decency.

Do I need to talk about illiterate speech? The rules for conjugation, declension, pronunciation exist for a reason. They show the level of education and culture.

Pay attention to sound

The volume, timbre of voice, clarity of pronunciation have a significant impact on the interlocutor and the audience. The tone of the narrator is equally important. It is unacceptable for a well-mannered person to conduct a conversation in an arrogant, arrogant tone. You cannot give your voice excessive instructiveness - this humiliates and insults the listener.

A good conversation is one in which the sound matches the situation.

When communicating with children, an emotionally bright, positive, cheerful tone is used. Defense of scientific work requires a neutral, narrative sound. Sellers of goods "for adults" lower their voices, speak slowly, often use semantic pauses.

What happens if you change everything?

Will the kids like the scientist's dryness? How will the audience of scientists react to the speaker's unusual voice - low, hoarse, slightly aspirated? And what if in a sex shop a shy customer suddenly stumbles upon an overly loud and cheerful salesperson?

Establish contact with the interlocutor

It is important to make time for your opponent during the conversation. Otherwise, the result is only a boring, long monologue. One-time, because no one wants to meet with such a “talker” twice. A few rules for polite dialogue:

  • show respect, call the interlocutor by name (first name and patronymic);
  • ask questions - simple and rhetorical;
  • forget about monosyllabic or vague answers “yes”, “no,” “maybe”, “who knows”, “we'll see”;
  • look at the interlocutor, do not ignore him, do not get distracted by trifles;
  • keep a distance according to the level of intimacy.

The conversation resembles passing the ball: he spoke himself - pass the ball to another player. It is completely impolite to hold this ball in your hands for a good half hour and then leave with it without making a “pass”.

Find a balance between topic and digressions

Jokes, lyrical and philosophical digressions, memories, secondary topics stir up interest in the conversation. But only if they don't ignore the main subject of the conversation.

A person comes to the clinic to find out the cost of services. He is not interested in when this hospital was founded, what doctors work here, and how many local nurses have diplomas. Yes, this is important information, and you can mention it, but after the announcement of the price list and without intrusiveness.

Avoiding those taboo

If the interlocutor is an unfamiliar person, it makes sense to limit the range of issues discussed. This will save you from embarrassing situations and conflicts. These topics include:

  • religion;
  • politics;
  • attitude towards sexual minorities;
  • diseases;
  • any problems in the life of the interlocutor;
  • intimate, personal questions;
  • gossip, discussions with a negative bias.

You can talk about work, culture, hobbies, institutions, animals, and so on. Discussion of topics from the list is permissible only with a loved one who inspires confidence and shows it in response. If a new acquaintance suddenly begins to touch upon an awkward topic, you can try to smoothly change the subject of the conversation or directly, but politely declare that you do not want to discuss this issue.

Advice on how to speak correctly may sound easy, but practice proves the opposite. To successfully apply them, you will have to learn self-control, develop mindfulness. A good interlocutor monitors his speech and the reaction of the opponent at the same time. He always knows exactly when it is better to change the subject or stop the conversation altogether. Such skills require careful work on yourself. But it is they who serve as the hallmark of a person with whom it is really pleasant to communicate.