Human life is surrounded by stress and resentment. It is not uncommon for people to face injustice and aggression, which provokes a response in the form of anger and anger. Without noticing it, people begin to hate their enemies, causing irreparable harm to them, but at the same time harming themselves, because they become hardened, sowing chaos and dark anger in their souls. People close to them also begin to suffer from this. Some try to remove this ailment by using alcohol, others use the advice of a neighbor, or a psychologist. But in spiritual culture there are also more effective methods - these are Orthodox prayers from anger and irritation.

How to prepare and read a prayer

It is necessary to retire in a separate room so that no one is distracted during prayer. Here is the procedure:

1. It must be understood that prayer is communication with God and his helpers.
2. Place one or more icons next to it.
3. Light a candle.
4. Close your eyes and focus if you know the prayer by heart. Or, just keep the text of the prayer in front of you, and trying to understand the meaning more accurately, read the prayer sincerely.
5. Read this prayer several times.
6. Remain in silence, listen to yourself.
7. If you feel anxious, say the prayer a few more times.

Prayer from anger and anger to Ephraim the Sirin

Anger in the Christian tradition is considered one of the main sins of man. The remedy for this mental illness is Orthodox prayer. Especially effective it helps in the fight against anger and irritation of the prayer of the Monk Ephraim the Syrian. During his lifetime, Ephraim himself was a hot-tempered person, but through persistent spiritual work and with God's help, he acquired the gift of goodness and humility. And using the experience and gifts of this companion, one can heal from an illness and find peace in the soul.

O saint of Christ, our father Ephraim! Bring our prayer to the merciful and all-powerful God and ask us, the servants of God (names), that his goodness is all for the benefit of our souls and bodies: faith is right, hopeless, unhypocritical love, meekness and gentleness, courage in temptations, patience in misery , in piety, perfection. Let us not turn the gifts of the All-Good God into evil. Do not forget, miraculous holy one, both this holy temple (house) and our parish: preserve and observe them with your prayers from all evil. To her, holy God, grant us a good end and inherit the Kingdom of Heaven, but let us glorify the wondrous God in His saints, all glory, honor and power, forever and ever, befits Him. Amen.

Prayers to Nicholas the Wonderworker

It is not uncommon for people to face injustice and aggression, which triggers a response in the form of anger and anger. Orthodox prayers allow you to fight these ailments and for this, you need to turn to the Lord, the Most Holy Theotokos and the saints, with a request for help and support. In everyday hustle and bustle, faced with manifestations of anger and anger, it is better not to pay the attacker with the same coin, but to say a short prayer to yourself several times. Doing so often will increase the power of prayer, and the looming clouds of conflict will quickly dissipate. But the main thing, in this case, is not to rely on laurels, but to continue the prayer work.

Prayer for anger

Prayer for anger

Miracle worker Nikolai, pacify my anger and attack, do not let me sinful abyss. Thy will be done. Amen.

Prayer appeal to the icon "Softening Hearts"

Remembering what a terrible destructive force malice is, a believer should try to soften his heart. For this, in Orthodoxy there is an icon "Softening Hearts" ("Seven-shot"). When reading a prayer, the heart of the person praying gradually thaws and warms up and acquires the ability to let in rays of light and goodness. Of course, the feeling of anger is very persistent and does not immediately let go of the heart, but patient and persistent prayer work leads to good results. Bitterness recedes, a person softens and gradually opens up to spiritual truths.

Akathist of the Mother of God in honor of her miraculous icon "Softening of Hearts"

Oh, the long-suffering Mother of God, surpassing all the daughters of the earth, in her purity and in the multitude of sufferings that you endured on earth, accept our many-painful sighs and keep us under the cover of your mercy. A different refuge and warm intercession are we not for You, but as if you have boldness towards Who was born of You, help and save us with Your prayers, so that we will reach the Kingdom of Heaven without any doubt, where, with all the saints, we will sing in the Trinity to the One God now and forever and forever centuries. Amen.

Soften our wicked hearts, the Mother of God, and extinguish the misfortunes of those who hate us, and resolve any tightness of our souls.

We are touched by Your holy image, looking at Your suffering and mercy, and we kiss Your wounds, but our arrows that torment You are terrified. Do not give us (names), Merciful Mother, in our hardheartedness and from the hardheartedness of our neighbors to perish, You fight against truly evil hearts softening. Amen.

Prayer for irritability and anger (Abba Dorotheus)

The Monk Abba Dorotheos taught that one must learn not to show anger and irritability towards one's neighbor, placing above one's humility, so that the soul of the believer would ascend above strife and conflict. In this case, a person put himself and the values ​​of life in harmony, above everyday conflicts and avoided head-on collisions, and his opponent, not meeting opposition, could not be in a state of anger and irritability for a long time, and was forced to retreat. Turning to God in prayers, he already purified the atmosphere of his life and eradicated the very cause of the conflict.

Prayer text

Merciful and benevolent God! By your ineffable goodness, He created us out of nothing, to enjoy Your blessings, and by the blood of Your Only Begotten Son, our Savior, who called us, who departed from Your commandments! Come now, help our infirmities, and as You once forbade the turbulent sea, so now also forbid the indignation of our hearts, so that You do not lose both of us in one hour, Your children, killed by sin, and so that you do not say to us: From my blood, always descend into decay, ”and:“ Amen, I say to you, we do not blow you, ”because our lamps have gone out from a lack of oil. Amen.

Prayer for husband's aggression

In the event of a family conflict and husband's aggression, it is very difficult for a woman during stress to remember a big prayer and therefore the prayer should be short. When reading a prayer, one must mentally sign the sign of the cross on the husband. The prayer must be repeated several times and then the demons retreat and the conflict subsides. But we cannot stop there. It is necessary to pray every day that counsel and love will be fully restored in the family. According to reviews on social networks, women who applied this prayer said that they managed not only to calm down their raging husband, but also angry neighbors.

Prayer text

May God rise and be scattered around him!

Prayer for anger in the soul

Keeping anger in the soul is dangerous both for the soul itself and for the body. Realizing that anger has settled in the soul, it is necessary to turn in prayer to the heavenly helpers. As a result, the believer receives the support of Heavenly Patrons, finds consolation and care. He gradually begins to understand that he is not alone, and in fact, surrounded by attention and a desire to help him, you just need not to alienate those who are happy to come to his aid. It must be understood that peace in the soul is created by the efforts of two parties, the believer and the Heavenly Forces, and help comes as a result of his conversion.

Prayer text

Bind the union of love to Thy apostle, Christ, and us, Thy faithful servants, to ourselves so tightly bind Thy commandments: love each other unhypocritically, create with prayers, Mother of God, one who is loving for mankind. With the flame of love they inflamed to me, the servant of God (...), the hearts of all, Christ God, until they kindled with their hearts, with their thoughts, souls and all human strength, they will love me sincerely, as they glorify themselves and my commandments, all the good giver. Deliver, Lord, the servant of God (...) from hatred, anger, non-peacefulness and dislike. In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen.

Prayers for resentment and anger

Without noticing this, a person sometimes takes offense at his loved ones, thereby causing them suffering, and by hating his enemies, he himself becomes the property of demons. Therefore, you need to accustom yourself to spiritual work, turning to Jesus Christ or Nicholas the Wonderworker. Prayer is spiritual work and its fruits do not arise from scratch. You must first sow the seeds of goodness in your soul, take care of them and protect them from ailments, patiently cultivating them. It is no accident that everyday prayer work is called spiritual exploit. It is even much more difficult than ordinary worldly work, but the values ​​grown as a result of this are of great importance for all people. The fruits grown in the field of spiritual labor can become the property of other people and therefore it is difficult to overestimate the efforts of the prayer book. It is not for nothing that they say: "Acquire a peaceful spirit within yourself and thousands around you will be saved." Therefore, we must accustom ourselves to everyday, albeit short, but sincere prayer.

Prayer to Jesus Christ

Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of God. Deliver me from resentment against my neighbor at the behest of the Most High God. May it be so. Amen.

Prayer to Nicholas the Wonderworker

Miracle worker Nikolai, calm my exorbitant anger, clear the wrong road. Thy will be done. Amen.

Prayer to the Mother of God

The prayer to the Mother of God out of anger and irritation was included in the book "Prayers to the Most Holy Theotokos" as the eleventh prayer. The history of the creation of the book "Prayers to the Most Holy Theotokos" dates back to Metropolitan Benjamin (Fedchenkov). The Metropolitan said that the sole purpose of creating the book was for people to turn and pray to the Intercessor. An outstanding hierarch of the Russian Orthodox Church in the USA, a theologian, reported on the reasons that prompted him to write this book, and wrote with bitterness in 1940 that “prayer disappears from life,” people have forgotten how to pray and do not turn to the Most Holy Theotokos at all. In his books, Benjamin tried in every possible way to convince and prove that prayer is the work and life of the soul and is the basis for its spiritual growth. He said that turning to the Mother of God in prayer, a person partakes of her holiness and in daily prayer work transforms his soul, cleansing himself of defilement and disease.

Prayer text

Most Holy Lady Theotokos! Hear my prayer and fulfill it; on Ty bo the hope of all ends of the earth, I hope.

Quench the flame on my body. Calm the storm of anger. Consume to the end the vain exaltation of my vain youth. Weaken the crafty dreams of the heart, guided by evil spirits. Izushi constantly finding a stream of impure thoughts tempting me.

Learn my language only useful verb, my eyes behold the one beauty of the shrine. Open my ears, so that I can fill myself with the sweetest honey with the broadcast of the Holy Scripture and I create with Your help. Cleanse my mouth, that I may be honored to call the Most High God my Father. Grant me the time of repentance and save me from sudden death. Cleanse and washed from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit. Give your servant a broken heart, pacification of thoughts, chastity of the mind, sobriety of the soul, humility in thoughts, the right spirit, a prudent life, and also peace, the Lord was his gift as His disciple. Save me in unperturbed silence; rejoice me with unspeakable and never-ending joy; as if, having repented, I walk the right path of the commandments of Thy Son, and the rest of my life, my past is no longer borne by the judgment of my conscience. Give me, now praying to You, a pure prayer; Yes, I praise You worthily, even until my death, all the days of my saving feat. Upon death, release me from the vicious tortures of the air tax collectors.

You, about the Lady of the Mother of God, the light of my darkened eyes, the consolation of my soul, my hope and salvation, I offer this prayer.

To this day and even for one I pray to Thee, my Guide Abiding: vouch for me, who repented and grieved about sins, uncondemned, if I am not worthy in every way, to partake of the Most Pure Blood and Body of the Son and Thy God, for the salvation of the soul and the healing of the body and as a pledge eternal life. In the future sweetness of the Heavenly Supper, partake of the heavenly ineffable graces of the Kingdom of God. And I, having been vouchsafed to receive these blessings, will glorify Thy Son and Thy God with His Beginning Father and His Life-Giving Spirit, as it is now, as it is and ever, and forever. Amen.

Prayer "Invocation of the help of the Holy Spirit"

A person lives and makes mistakes, sometimes cursing himself and others for their misdeeds, accumulating anger in his soul. Anger begins to eat him from the inside, looking for a way out and an object of revenge. This is a terrible period of the inception and development of mental illness and if it is not stopped, it can result in a serious illness or crime. When a person feels that anger has accumulated inside him, it is necessary to admit this to yourself, and then direct this energy not to the one who causes anger in you, but to a good cause. The best remedy, in this case, would be Orthodox prayer. Turning to the highest values ​​in daily prayer, he thereby gradually purifies his thoughts and soul, transforming, not only internally, but also externally. In the eyes of a person, fierce anger no longer blackens, but the light of love of the heavenly world begins to manifest itself. In this case, the prayer "Invocation of the help of the Holy Spirit" helps well. It is best suited for a person with a mental illness and therefore is short and easy to understand and memorize, allowing you to read it many times, including when there is mental turmoil.

Prayer text

To the Creator and Creator of all, O God, the works of our hands, beginning to Your glory, with Your blessing, hastily correct, and deliver us from all evil, for there is only one all-powerful and Humanitarian.

Prayer from hate to man

Hatred of a person is a grave sin and evil that burns out from within both the one who hates him and his enemy. And here, in fact, it is not so important who was right and who was not. In this struggle, there is no winner and no loser, because both will suffer. When both opposing sides receive the ripe fruits of evil and weigh them by the measure and at the cost of loss and suffering, they will be horrified at what they have done. It is easier to punish or kill an enemy than to understand and forgive him. But the reckoning for this will be inevitable. No wonder they say that the best fight is the one that did not take place. Therefore, the Holy Scripture says that one must love not only one's neighbor, but also the enemy, learn to forgive and be merciful. Therefore, it is necessary to turn in a prayer request for help and support to the Lord Jesus Christ.

To overcome anger, you first need to understand what this feeling is and where it comes from. We can say that feelings depend on the system of motivation, they show how well needs are being satisfied. When needs are not met, you feel bad. And the stronger the need, the worse it will be for you.

When plans are thwarted by circumstances, you experience irritation that turns into discouragement. You cannot change anything and it makes you feel bad. But if a person interfered with the implementation of your plans, then you feel anger towards him, since he is the reason for the dissatisfaction of your need.

In the distant past increased activity and the aggressive behavior characteristic of anger was helpful. If you have to solve the conflict by force, with a fight and yelling, then this can be useful in our time. But in the civilized world, problems are rarely solved with the use of physical force, so the feeling of anger is often useless.

You will most likely try to forget the situation in which you experienced anger, try to get it out of your head so as not to experience negative emotions again. But when you are, the memory will come back and torment you again.

Analyze the situation itself. What did this person do wrong to you? Is it as important now as it was at that moment?

If not, try to forgive him. But if your anger was completely justified, and his act turned out to be unforgivable and vile, then you will need a different strategy.

Why understanding and forgiving is the only option

Forgiveness is a universal way of dealing with a situation. First of all, it is important for the one who forgives, because it frees him from the negativity that eats away from the inside.

When you are angry with someone for a long period of time, it is because you remember the hurtful situation in detail and keep replaying it in your head. The detailed memory is perceived as a repetition of the event, and the feeling of anger reappears.

So if someone tells you, “I have forgiven but have not forgotten,” don’t believe him. Forgiveness helps to forget the details of the event, therefore, the person ceases to experience it over and over again. Forgiveness and forgetting go hand in hand.

Just because you have forgiven a person does not mean that your relationship is the same. Maybe you will be disappointed in him and will no longer trust him, but at least you will stop being angry.

Create distance

What about a situation where you just can't forgive someone? Does this mean that all your life you will remember the details of a quarrel or an ugly act and fan the fire of hatred inside? Not necessary at all.

The depth and strength of the emotional response to a particular person depends on how close you take everything. When you are angry, you constantly replay in your head the case when you were offended. This is such a kind of mental gum.

Try to move away from this situation. When it reappears in your head, imagine that it happened to one of your friends, and not to you. As a result, you will be able to look at the circumstances in a more abstract way. You will move away from disturbing details, which will help calm your head as well.

Take a different perspective

Anger forces us to think narrowly. When you are very angry with someone, you miss out on the opportunities that situation opens up for you.

There is a good phrase: "If life gives you lemon, make lemonade out of it." You may not change your mind about the person, but you can look at the situation from a different angle and learn a useful lesson.

You can also try to understand the person you are angry with. When we do an ugly act, we justify our behavior by the circumstances. If someone else is mistaken, then we explain this by the fact that he has such a character. For example, we consider the thief to be dishonest, evil and insidious by default and do not consider the circumstances that led him to theft: lack of money, lack of proper upbringing, difficult childhood, and so on.

By putting yourself in the shoes of the person you are angry with, you can see a number of circumstances that led them to do this. Perhaps you still disagree that he did the right thing and that it was the only possible option, but at least you will stop considering him pure evil. It will be easier for you to forgive and forget this situation.

To get rid of intense anger - difficult task, but you need to do it. When we are under the influence of strong negative emotions, we rarely make good decisions, especially at work. Anger can harm not only those around us, but also ourselves.

Therefore, as soon as you calm down a little and notice the emotions seething inside, try to get rid of them as soon as possible.

What helps you calm down?

Good day, dear readers. Today we'll talk about how to get rid of anger. You will find out how it is. Find out for what reasons it develops, what can affect it. Let's talk about ways to get rid of and self-control.

Types of anger

1. Silent hate. A situation when a person does not in any way betray his anger. He may smile at an individual he hates, in fact, this behavior is disingenuous.
2. Resentment for the whole world. A person hates everything that surrounds him, he believes that everyone owes him, and the world is against him, people are against him. He is lonely, no one needs him.
3. Competition. For example, here we can talk about a situation when two women compete for one man, respectively, they hate each other.
4. The game. One individual deliberately provokes the other into bouts of aggression, thereby deriving pleasure from it.
5. Despair. The attack of anger is demonstrative in nature. In this way, a person attracts attention to himself.

Possible reasons for the formation

The following factors can affect the birth of bouts of anger and anger:

• when someone refuses to help, be it material support or physical, moral - then the person begins to get angry with the individual who did not provide help in difficult times;
• a person can be angry with people who gossip behind his back, condemn, discuss him - in such a situation it is very difficult to ignore what is happening, resentment accumulates;
• ignoring - a situation when someone begins to pretend that they do not notice you, a desire is born to somehow punish this person, anger appears;
• family troubles - when anger arises at close people, for example, a spouse or wife, everyday difficulties;
• betrayal - when one of the partners cheats on the other, either morally or physically;
• non-repayment of debt - when an individual asks for a loan, and then does not return a penny, hatred is born to such a person;
• problems with hormonal background, especially in adolescence and women at the time of menopause, in such situations, attacks of aggression are not excluded;
• - anger is born in response to another person's attempts to inflict moral or physical harm, for example, to let go of his hands or to speak.

Ways to deal with anger

1. Self-training for anger and anger. A person should tune in to positive emotions, mentally say goodbye to the anger that sometimes arises, learn to forgive other people, accept everyone as they are.
2. Straight Talk. You need to learn to communicate with loved ones without anger, if there is something painful it is better to tell about it, not to keep it in yourself, not to save up anger for someone.
3. If some misunderstandings arise between loved ones, a conflict begins to develop and it is not possible to resolve it peacefully, sometimes it is better to take a short pause in the relationship, to give each other time to realize their mistakes, so that partners can understand the reasons why which they have negative emotions in relation to each other.
4. To get rid of envy and anger towards a certain person, you need to learn to ignore communication with this person or to minimize it. The individual must learn to get rid of annoying factors or put mental blocks in front of what causes feelings of anger.
5. Sports activities. Often, it is possible to throw out excess negativity with the help of physical exercises, for example, it is not necessary to engage in boxing or some kind of martial arts, you can go to the gym, thereby getting rid of.
6. You need to learn how to define the boundaries of personal space, perhaps there are people who encroach on it and thereby cause irritation. Indicate to the individuals with whom you communicate that it is unacceptable to be at a very short distance, you need to keep your distance.
7. Take up meditation, master oriental practices. This will make it easier for you to learn how to relax, get rid of negative thoughts and emotions.
8. Learn to give vent to your own emotions, do not hold back all the accumulated negative in yourself. In fact, being angry is good, a person should show different emotions, not only laugh, have fun. If necessary, he should be angry. The main thing is that the outburst of anger is not directed at other people. For example, you can take a pillow and start banging it or a newspaper and start tearing it into small pieces. This will allow you to calm down and come to peace of mind. Do not notice how it will become much easier, the anger will recede.
9. You can try to state on a piece of paper all that is painful, all your anger and hatred. After you describe everything, burn this sheet.
10. You can throw out your anger by screaming, but for this it is better to be somewhere far from people, so that you do not frighten neighbors or relatives, for example, standing in the forest or being at your dacha when it is not the vegetable garden season.
11. Try to stop, take a break before you say anything bad people... While you are "on pause", bad thoughts will recede, the mood will change, the desire to say nasty things to someone will disappear.
12. If there is a strong desire to be rude to someone, then it is better to go for a walk, get some fresh air. So you can calm down. Washing the dishes helps some people, it will calm and calm down, make it possible to realize what could have happened and what it is connected with.
13. If there is a feeling that you are about to explode, throw out a sea of ​​negative words addressed to some person, imagine that your mouth is full of water and there is no way to speak now.
14. If you cannot cope with the negative that accumulates in your body on your own, you need to seek help from a psychologist or psychotherapist. A specialist will teach you how to cope with such emotions.

If you want to relieve your anger and irritability, the following guidelines can help you.

1. Remember that we are all different, we all have some positive and negative traits, do not be too biased towards other people.
2. Do not withdraw into yourself, do not keep all the anger inside. Learn to treat any event with humor, try to find something positive in any situation.
3. Engage in the development of your own confidence - this will make it easier to relate to any situation, you will be able to steadfastly resist someone's provocation to angry emotions.
4. Change your social circle. If there are people around you who annoy you, they will constantly provoke negative feelings and the development of anger. It is better to have those around who bring only positive emotions.
5. There is no need to suppress anger that wants to come out. Over time, the accumulated anger will begin to destroy your body from the inside, thereby contributing to the development of serious diseases.
6. Learn to relate to the situation correctly, to overestimate your needs. Sometimes a person can get angry with a subscriber because of some family problems. It is unacceptable to get lost in public just because they behave somehow differently, try to put yourself in their place.
7. Sometimes you need to visit a neurologist or psychotherapist, perhaps your behavior is due to problems with nervous system or it's all to blame.

Now you know how to overcome the negativity in yourself, how to get rid of the anger inside yourself. Remember that for a normal life, a person needs to experience positive emotions. The negative that accumulates inside or constantly splashes out on others, only harms the individual himself, worsens his psychological and physical health. Therefore, it is very important to learn how to control yourself, to prevent outbursts of aggression and anger.

Attacks of anger are unpleasant things both for the person himself and for those around him. How to learn to relieve attacks of anger, is it possible, in principle, to change your character, to become a calmer and more restrained person? Sometimes you can.

What doesn't work?

It makes little sense to fight the temper tantrums while you are tense. Anger "feeds" on your tension, and the more you strain against it, the more your anger is strengthened. Instead of fighting your anger, try to relax, it will have a much better effect.

It seems natural to feel ashamed and reproach yourself for your anger, but it doesn't change the situation. "Is such an intelligent and adult person like me offended?" - the phrase is weak, it does not help to cope with anger, but internal discontent intensifies: after all, if I continue to be angry, then I am not-smart and not-adult ... Just to note for myself: "I am very angry" is more useful, it makes it possible to start further act.

Change your character? - This is real

In all seriousness, in order for you to stop the fits of anger, you need to change your character, become calm and restrained. Sometimes it seems unrealistic, incredible, impossible, but it is not. Character is a collection of habits, and habits can be changed. If you set yourself this task and start training calm reactions, you can do it.

Note: Sean Carroll's behavior was filmed on a dash cam and it was actually very helpful. He knew that TV people were filming the experiment with him, his wife regularly asked about his successes, every evening he copied the data from the video to his flash drive ... The situation was built in such a way that Sean did not forget about his intention, and that was what helped him. He did not forget - he did - he succeeded. What will you do so that you do not forget your intention to react more restrained, calmer?

If you are a serious person and understand that you need to cope with the outbursts of anger, practice the Calm Presence exercises often. Alternatively, live the anger-generating situation in advance against a relaxed, or better, positive background. It is always useful to master auto-training, develop an understanding of people and a benevolent attitude towards people. See Developing Goodwill

What helps situationally?

Switching attention. If you are distracted, you have already half calmed down. The whole question is how to distract yourself? Sean Carroll was helped to think about what is happening in his brain, how to help his frontal lobes to extinguish the activity of the amygdala. Someone begins to look at their anger from the outside: what is it? What does it look like? Where does it concentrate? Emotion usually has a center - fear, for example, lives in the throat and shoulders. Find a localization of your anger and try to relax those muscles that are tense. It is unlikely that you will be able to cool down instantly - say phrases that will calm you down: At first, short (Sorry. Flushed.). Then take it and pause. Then continue: more calmly.

Figure out . Often people make noise and rage until they figured out what happened. Do not hurry. Try to understand if your anger has a basis and if there are better ways to respond than anger. Stop winding yourself up. Relax, report on what happened, calculate the real damage from what happened - better in hard currency. What's next? See →

Hint: Anger often takes the form of resentment or is an element of it, so working with anger has many overlaps with and is similar to working with resentment. Accordingly, begin to understand according to the same scheme as the grounds for resentment are sorted out.

To quickly normalize your condition, put your body in order. Once it is enough to get out of the stupor, to shake oneself. Sometimes it is best to put on sneakers and run to the stadium: after an hour's jog it will become easier, walking in the fresh air changes your inner state, and if after that you can lie down, relax, or even more sleep, you will wake up in a calm state.

Splash and switch anger... If you feel that today you are ready to break loose, because anger overwhelms you, then look for an opportunity to speak, shout, throw out your anger, react in one way or another. One of the simplest and most common procedures is to vent your anger in a safe direction. The Chinese often start their morning by running up the nearest mountain (a small wooded hill) and yelling for 5-10 minutes, expressing their anger and aggression. After that, cleansed, contented and smiling, they run down the hill ...

It is important - it does not always work, it does not work for long and does not help everyone. For conditions and limitations, see Expression of emotion ...

All this does not solve the issue as a whole, rage will arise again, but in a specific situation you can calm yourself down. For a start, this is good, and then - think again about how to correct your character in general.

In addition to joy, delight, surprise and admiration, we often experience destructive emotions. Anger, rage, resentment, jealousy, irritability and anger are an integral part of each of us. They are a natural reaction to events that occur, signaling both to us and to those around us that something is not going the way we would like. It is impossible to get rid of them, and it is not necessary, otherwise we would not be able to distinguish between what we like and what is dangerous. But it is imperative to reduce their impact on the psyche of those who unnecessarily suffer from such feelings.

We analyze how to get rid of anger

Emotions rule life, as does the mind. For some, they play a very important role, while others were able to cope with them and keep them tightly in check. Both positive and negative feelings are necessary for a person, because they help him understand what suits him and what does not. Without such a mechanism, we would not know what to do and how to act.

Despite their important role, negative emotions such as anger should not be allowed to cause too many problems. It should be instantaneous, like a flash, giving way after itself to completely different feelings and, allowing you to calmly understand the situation that provoked its occurrence. When she does not let go for a second, and more and more often appears out of nowhere, the time has come to deal with her life and inner world, otherwise problems that can destroy the established order of things cannot be avoided.

When anger begins to dominate other feelings, accompanied by outbursts of anger and irritability, the brain ceases to adequately perceive the situation. And instead of objectively assessing the difficulties or disagreements that have arisen, it becomes even more difficult to cope with the negativity and harm that is caused both to yourself and to those around you. But do not try solely by willpower to solve such a difficult problem.

You can get rid of it only by finding out the reason for its appearance, but without using willpower, with the help of which a strong person can order himself to calm down. But he will not stop being nervous, but will only drive negative feelings deep inside, never figuring out whether something really went wrong.

In order to force the brain to again adequately assess the situation that provoked excessive stress, throw out the accumulated irritation. Active physical exercises will help with this: running, walking, swimming or team play. It will not hurt to listen to your favorite music, loudly singing along to the performer, a loud scream - where no one hears, destruction of an old newspaper or knocking out a carpet or pillow. By splashing out annoyance in any of these ways, you can more calmly look at what is happening.

Often, anger is a reaction to the behavior of a specific person who offended in word or deed, did not live up to expectations, or dared to criticize. Many do not understand that holding a resentment deep in the soul and even more so hatching plans for revenge will in no way help to punish the offender, even if he really is. It will only harm you. Taking revenge on him, you will feel satisfaction for just a second, but then you will return to the fact that during this time, while planning revenge, you missed great opportunities to achieve more in life and fulfill your cherished dreams. And obsession with someone, especially one who is completely unworthy of it, does not in the best way affect relations with others.

Few are able to withstand a person next to him, from whom anger spreads in waves. After all, its effect in a normal situation should cause some kind of action, and then it disappears, and the psychological state returns to normal. When this does not happen, and it accumulates inside, without disappearing anywhere, anyone becomes like a time bomb, you do not know when it will explode. The impetus for most diseases, according to many doctors, is stress, and there is no way to avoid it when every minute of your life is riddled with anger. Nothing is as harmful to health as chronic feelings and negativity.

Is it really worth the sacrifice to try to hurt an unworthy girlfriend, ex-boyfriend, colleague or business partner? No amount of pleasure in retribution will make up for so much wasted precious time and life-changing opportunities that everybody has from time to time. You can't do everything, you always have to make a choice: either to develop, take care and think about yourself and dear people, or devote time to those who have offended and insulted.

Therefore, forgiveness is not just the foundation of the Christian religion, but a real panacea for wasted years and a guardian that protects our health. Be generous, learn to forgive and let go of past hurts. Live your life, forgetting about those who hurt. Let their actions remain with them, do not load an unbearable and unnecessary burden on your shoulders.

• There is no stronger person than one who knows how to forgive, and has learned to tolerate human weaknesses. Realizing that everyone is not perfect, they not only do not try to become ideal with manic tenacity, but they also do not deprive others of the right to have flaws. The most unfortunate people are perfectionists - those who, by all means, strive to be the best in everything, forgetting that we are not all eternal, and over the years, many things become completely unimportant and secondary, although many spend a lot on them. amount of time.
• Don't waste your time, admit everyone has the right to make mistakes. At the same time, no one can deprive you of the right to communicate with those who like, avoiding, and getting rid of, at the same time, forever, from those who are not suitable for a variety of reasons. Tolerance does not mean that you are doomed to tolerate around those who cause irritation. On the contrary, it teaches you not to waste your nerves on those whom you will never see again, with whom you can not communicate and be more indulgent towards loved ones if they have stumbled just once.

• Treat emerging troubles with a touch of irony. Unpleasant situations always happen in life, and your task is to get out of them with the least loss. And for this it is very important to learn not to panic and stay cool. This is what will allow you to find the best way out for any difficulties. What happened happened, why aggravate the situation even more, constantly trying to understand why it happened to you. An analysis of what happened, of course, is needed to gain experience and prevent similar in the future, but the search for an answer to the question "For what?" and "How is that?" - waste of time.
• When someone tries to provoke you, take a deep breath and count to 10 silently to yourself. This will not only prevent anger from taking over you, but will also allow you to fight back. People who try to take their anger out on others suffer from internal problems and mental anguish, you do not need to be angry with them, you can only feel sorry for them. But in order not to test yourself for strength, try to get away from an unpleasant conversation.

• Be wiser. Do not rush to take offense or sort things out, maybe the person did not want to offend you at all and did not think that you would react in this way to his words or actions. Sometimes, just a few words are enough to understand what happened.
• Boil, speak out loud or splash out emotions on paper. So you will not offend anyone and do not force yourself to unduly restrain yourself in expressions. Having freed the soul from the negativity that pours from TV screens and from some acquaintances, it is much easier to find an opportunity to put a barrier on the path of aggression and anger.
• Most often, the best way to protect yourself from unnecessary annoyance and hatred is to turn off the TV and go for a walk with your kids, loved one, or your dog. After all, it's no secret to anyone that all news programs convey a lot of negativity. And this in itself creates unnecessary tension, provoking unreasonable aggression and rage.

Don't let anger get in your way. It should look like a flash, and not turn into a feeling that does not let go for a second, inseparably accompanying every minute of life. Otherwise, instead of helping, she will create so many negative situations that you will not have time to cope with them. Therefore, find the strength in yourself and try to get rid of all the accumulated negativity that has become the reason for her constant presence. And then your life will sparkle with completely different colors.